Stand Bi Me: Bisexual Awareness

Understanding sexuality wouldn’t be sufficient without analyzing the history of bisexuality. Yet, in order to maintain the cultural dominance of hetero- and homo-, bisexuality is often overlooked.

When it comes to history, bisexuality, same-sex relations, exclusively or in addition to opposite-sex relations, have been recorded in almost every ancient civilization. Homosexual and bisexual themes have been incorporated even in medieval literature. But, ancient societies did not associate sexual relations with the well-defined labels that modern Western society does, which may be one of the reasons why scholars have ‘’avoided’’ to tap the subject of bisexuality in ancient societies more comprehensively.

In fact, it is more common to theorize about ‘’the modern history of bisexuality’’ and recognize its origins in the 19th century (MacDowall, 2009). Through its biological, psychological and sexual categories, the contemporary history of bisexuality develops in relation to Darwinism, shaping its articulation as we know it today. Over a century, bisexuality has been evolving, both being shaped and shaping the cultural change, academic endeavor and individual experience. But, the history of bisexuality can also be interpreted along the lines of ’’out of the darkness and into the shadows’’ (Taylor, 2018).

For hundreds of years, bisexuality hasn’t really been taken as a legitimate sexual identity, where the existence of bisexual individuals was and is being challenged. This concept of ’’bisexual erasure’’ (Angelides, 2001.) became one of the ‘’hot topics’’ in recent discussions of sexuality, where it is acknowledged that bisexuality was, not only seen as irrelevant and erased, but misinterpreted too. Bisexual erasure or, more precisely, bisexual invisibility occurs in scholarly circles, cultural attitudes and the everyday experiences of bisexual individuals.

The growing need to address poor mental health and high suicide rates among bisexual people in our society, once again, highlights the need to examine bisexuality from its historic roots to its present form. Hence, the importance of #BiWeek Awareness. Bisexual people have been and still are a driving force within the LGBTQ community. That is why it is important for all activists, academics and health professionals to work together to integrate people who identify as bisexual into our communities without any stigma.

Gay Style & Expression In 1970s San Francisco

Unlike today, where you can disclose exactly what you’re looking for on social networks, such as Daddyhunt, gay men in the 1970s didn’t have that option. So, they used fashion and a code to let their admirers know that they were gay and what they were into sexually.

In the Castro, the answer was often sticking out of gay men’s back pockets – the ubiquitous handkerchief. For example, a orange handkerchief signaled that “Anything Goes”; whereas, the black handkerchief let other men know that you were into S&M. Hal Fischer’s book, Gay Semiotics, perfectly captures gay style and expression through the many photographs of gay men living in San Francisco during this period.

Ready for My Close-up Mr. Demille – Tips on the Perfect Photo for Your Daddyhunt Profile

Whether you’re a Daddy exhibitionist trying to capture the attention of the men on Daddyhunt or a hunter looking to connect with the ideal Daddy, having a great public profile photo can help you grab the attention of all the great men on Daddyhunt.

The men on Daddyhunt do more than turn heads. They exemplify the real men with no attitude who make us the No.1 online community for older gay men and their admirers. The reality is that selecting your public profile photos is often easier said than done. And we all know that people usually message first and look at profile details later. So, what makes for a great profile pic?

Most surveys have indicated that showing your smile and being candid gets more attention that a posed photo. In other words, smile and be yourself (natural). But on the flip-side, photos with sunglasses, bad selfies or bathroom selfies with dirty mirrors are less likely to grab someone’s attention.

A picture says a thousand words. So, update your public profile photos, smile and turn some heads!

Daddy Dealbreakers

We’ve all got ’em. Whether it’s ear hair or other physical or personality attributes, dealbreakers are a necessary part of navigating the world of dating. But when should they come into play? Some of us have friends who date with Seinfeldian levels of dealbreakers and bail at the first sign of something they don’t like. Should we bail so easily? After all, everyone deserves a fair chance and even things that we think we might have a hardline on can shift when we allow ourselves to get to know someone. The question becomes, when you do have a hardline and you’re having a good time with someone, when is the right time to bring up potential roadblocks?

Honesty is great and severely needed in every stage of a relationship, but in many cases, timing is key. By definition, a dealbreaker requires calling the whole thing off. However, it’s never really that simple! For instance, what if the supposed dealbreaker is something that can be tweaked, changed, or brought to their attention? We’re not advocating trying to change someone, because in most cases you will fail, but what if communicating your views could help mitigate the dealbreaker in question?

In some cases, the relationship may be more important than what’s breaking the deal. We ask all these questions because there are times when being confident and swift in the choices that you make can help you cut out some of the BS inherent with dating. It can also make us miss out on something truly life changing when we’re quick to judge and decide (especially in the world of online dating). At the end of the day, which should win out?

It seems to boil down to having an open heart and mind or being strong-willed and focused. The former can leave you vulnerable and susceptible to hurt and the latter closed off for the sake of self-preservation. Finding a balance between the two seems like our best bet even if it’s hard to come by.

So, when it comes to dating what are some of your dealbreakers? And what has life experience taught you about being more flexible when getting to know someone?

Perfecting the Daddy Work-Life Balance

Many of us in the Daddyhunt community lead very active lives, and lots of us are striving for success in every aspect of our everyday existence but finding that the right work-life balance can get tricky. Some of us are focused on meeting the right guy to start a relationship. For others, meeting someone is just a flicker of a thought because work takes up all of your time. It’s not always easy to create a life where both work and relationships have equal footing.

This is especially true when you break things down by age bracket. Perhaps in your early 20s you partied hard and creating a successful career was something that you started in your 30s. Or maybe it’s the exact opposite and you were driven in your 20s and 30s to get to the top, only to find yourself in your 40s with a comfortable lifestyle and no one to share it with. Either way, finding the right mix of these crucial components is key!

We’d love to hear from you all on this one. How have you managed to achieve a healthy work-life balance? What advice can you give to your fellow Daddyhunt community members?

Not All Daddies Are The Same

Gay culture, not unlike other cultures, is often perceived to be all about stereotypes. This is never truer than in any of the ‘named’ cultures (Bear, Leather, S&M, etc.). The ‘Daddy/Hunter’ community is no different. When we hear perfectly attractive hunters bemoaning the fact they can’t find a Daddy to date because they aren’t… insert stereotypical requirement here: young, slender, smooth, tall, athletic, etc…, it’s incredibly frustrating.

Really, guys, Daddies don’t all expect, require, or desire the same things. All you need to do is spend 5 minutes perusing the Daddy profiles on Daddyhunt to see that. Daddies exist in all different shapes and sizes and have different taste and interests. You can find profiles of Daddies looking for masculine guys, tall guys, short guys, hairy guys, smooth guys, and so on and so forth.

Not every Daddy lives up to the presumed stereotype. Not all Daddies spend their time chronically in search of some ‘perfect’ guy who meets some idealized, unrealistic standard. Okay, we admit that Daddies do tend to prefer that the hunters they desire find older guys appealing, but then, who of us doesn’t want to be thought of as attractive?

Okay, stereotypes exist for a reason. Sometimes, maybe more than sometimes, people live up to one stereotype or another. Most people don’t. The trick is finding a way for the ‘right’ Daddy to meet the ‘right’ hunter. That is the beauty of online communities like Daddyhunt. Such venues are safe places where we can share information about who we are, what we seek, and what it is we have to offer, affording us unique opportunities to form connections with those with whom we have complimentary interests. So, buck up, guys, it has worked for many couples who have met on Daddyhunt, and it can work for you. Happy Hunting!

Dad Meet Daddy

Let’s face it, there’s still a stigma around May-December romances within both the gay and straight communities. Introducing your boyfriend or partner to the family or friends is never an easy situation regardless of age differences. Often, when there’s an age difference, the perception that one is using the other for youth, money, or any number of things comes into play, which is often the contrary.

For this reason, introducing an older or younger significant other to the family (or even to your friends) can be a bit of an awkward situation. So, the best thing you can do for your family and your boyfriend/partner/husband is to prep them ahead of time. Whether you have a judgey aunt or a disapproving father (Check-yes), meeting the fam (or friends) is always a production. The best advice is to prep both sides as much as you can before the actual introduction.

In most cases, though, if you’re genuinely happy, families AND friends can see that and any other factors that may come into play just wash away like water off a duck’s back. That’s, of course, a best case scenario, but as with everything else, being open and honest about the situation is the best way to go.

We’d love to hear your stories and advice on how best to approach the situation. What was your experience like the first time you brought home your older or younger boyfriend/partner and introduced him to your family or friends?